The Great Groom Search

Pennukanal aka Finding Life Partner

Marriage is more between two families and two cultures. I have heard this saying long back. This is something true guys. So after a certain age, you will face all these questions in life as "when will be your marriage?" and "When can we expect a sadhya?" 

So, When you and your family decides yes, we are ready for this you will clearly have to start seeking a better half for you. You will move with 

• Matrimony portals

• Brokers

• Known person to your relatives. 

On the earlier stages we will behave as critics. And why not? 

You are officially allowed to check out a boy's details and select him!! That too with the permission of your parents!!! 

Well, That is still a big deal for many of us. I know there is a lot of others who are escaping from this as they have already found their partner they can skip this step. But they too will need to meet each other's family.

Back to where we were so you will screen them with them 

• Financial Status
• Education
• Physical Appearance
• Job security
• Place where he lives.

When my groom search was going on something funny happened.
My dad had almost given an HR round interview for one proposal.
The boy's father wants to know my percentage of marks from school times till college. My rank in entrance exam!

So after a few months you will come to the realization that you can't find a partner who is too much perfect. You can't tick all the column's. Then we will be in the more sensible search. You will look what is most important only. 

Yes, between this time you will meet some boys and you both may like each other. But that won't decide anything. Then your parents and a small set of relatives will visit his home. This visit is for checking out is everything alright there, and will that be okay for our daughter to live her life in that place.

Pro tip from my grandma:

When you visit their home you can't go straight and check out their bedroom and all right. After all, we are guests in their house. So she says "You ask them water and go with them so you can visit the kitchen and see how's the look there. Then you can ask for the bathroom as if you need to pee. Bingo! You get a chance to check the bedroom and bathroom also. You can check the attached bathroom also. Yes, I know My grandma Rock's :P

Now I can give you some tips:-

1. When they are in your home to see you ask for a 5min private talk with the boy.
2.  It's better your parents asks that for you.
3. If there is any specific condition for you, tell them right there As if 'You would like to work' or else 'You are planning to settle in some place'
4. If you need to know anything about his job go ahead and ask it. It is good to discuss and have a small understanding how each others job. 

Even this talk will be so little this will be like an icebreaker for both of you. 

When all meetings go into a positive  response, Yippee.. You are into the next stage.

If you have thoughts like 'I don't know if he's the one' and 'I have met him only for 5 min how can i decide if he's the person for me'. I do have some tricks to cool your minds.

Check his FB, Insta, Linked-in and what not google him girls. You will find something as if he is chilled or ice cold person. You can ask your friends to find the details about this boy. How's the boy's behavior? Does he have any bad habit's? Is he genuine.

Most of the parents will check his bio data, financial history and decide for marriage. Compatibility too is a major thing. But you girl you need to remember one thing You can back out anytime. Don't be afraid. But, think through each side. Ask your parents a time gap between engagement and marriage.

Some people are saying nowadays most of the people have the time gap between marriage and engagement. During this time both the bride and groom will contact through calls and meet ups. Many couples don't last and they will be separated even before marriage.

Let me tell you, It is not a big deal! Take my word. Compatibility was the issue between them. They were unable to sync with each other. No matter how much you try you won't be happy if you have gone forward that relation. Divorce is a hard word. It is better to avoid that and be happy in your life.

In my case we were having around 1 month time gap between marriage and engagement. Which was more than enough. If you get a chance to talk to the guy for 3-4 months GRAB IT.

But, Please don't hurry up anything. Take your time. If you are in doubt, ask your parents, friends.

Sooner or later you will find your super hero. He will be the prince charming for you.

Hope you like my writings. If you would like to read more about these kind of stuffs do let me know through comments. Please subscribe to my blog also.